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Bloodrayne

FINALLY,

I got to sit down with a Coke and watch Bloodrayne.

Now, keep in mind. I don't like any Uwe Boll movies, but I give every one of them a chance. I give him a chance to improve his art, and have his stable of writers improve their craft.

Here is how it is.

Not one character cares about anything. No one has a motive. Rayne says she wants to kill the head vampire for killing her mother... but that is it. Characters don't talk like they care either. Monotone is the way of the game apparently.

Now, the look. The movie looks fine. Even if some sets are cheap, and look kinda campy. They work. The colors are fine, and sets are done well enough. Its the costumes that are horrible. We are tossed into a world where if you do not matter you wear a blanket. If you matter you get FASHION! Also, all female leads must show their middrift at all times.

Weapons. The swords were too light for their size. Everyone was fighting with two handed swords with one hand. Swords need to be balanced for one handed fighting, non of which I saw in the movie were anything close to balanced... yes, that is taking it too far. Rayne has GIANT silly knife swords. That is probably how they looked in game... they could have been scaled down for the movie to add a little bit of realisim.

Editing. Decent. Although continutiy was obviously off at certain points. Plus, some shots just hang there, do nothing but waste time.

The end. We don't need a 10 minute recap of gore in the movie, and a smidge of gore that was cut... its boring. The movie is over. No need to do that. We were bored already at 15 minutes into the movie.


Overall. The movie is boring. Uwe could have thrown into 300 more sets of nakes ladies and it couldn't save this movie. Its like watching an average student film with a large budget. The professional actors in the film felt like local unpaid actors. Sex and nudity felt forced, and silly. The movie is okay, but make sure you don't give a damn about it.

I give it 3/10

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
dangerboyjon
Nov. 24th, 2006 06:57 am (UTC)
Aw snap.

Do you have any boxing experience? If not, Uwe's gunnin for ya.

If you have ever, I don't know.., HIT someone... then he's busy... forever.
joe_black
Nov. 25th, 2006 12:30 am (UTC)
yeah, I watched him box on the internet...

no way am I going to box a guy who knows what he is doing, plus about double my weight.
(Deleted comment)
joe_black
Nov. 28th, 2006 06:40 pm (UTC)
Re: I suppose we are all just who we are.
I loved Snakes on a Plane.

because it was a movie that didn't try to hide the fact that it was going to be horrible.

Uwe Boll on the other hand, doesn't understand that his movies are bad, at least that is how it seems from all the interviews I've heard and read. He honestly believes his action sequences in House of the Dead (? I think that was the name) were editing masterpieces.

I hope the man improves, I honestly do. I don't want to see him ruin other franchieses he has already purchased the rights (such as Hunter; the Reckoning).
an_aquired_tast
Nov. 28th, 2006 07:30 pm (UTC)
hryggilegur (Sorry)
I realized it may have been rude which is why I deleted it.
I think its just the day.
Truth is
I usually find myself in one of 3 categories when I watch movies
1: like it enough to watch it a second time
2: wasn't bad but wouldn't buy it
3: why did I waste my time and money

its just that by reading your post it seems that you start the movie with the purpose of analyzing it. I usually save that for the second viewing.
joe_black
Nov. 28th, 2006 07:45 pm (UTC)
Re: hryggilegur (Sorry)
I see a LOT of #2

rarely do I get a #3 since I have an ability to sense them... =P

#1... Yes, and then the movies I could watch over and over again...

Anyway, I didn't take your post as being mean. I was a little confused on the grammar but that was it. Thanks for dropping by for a chat!
an_aquired_tast
Nov. 28th, 2006 07:54 pm (UTC)
Re: hryggilegur (Sorry)
yeah I need to work on that.
I seem to run through my posts without correcting that
especially when I am working on 3 projects at the same time.
1 for school
1 for work and
1 for my book.
my editing usually gets done when I am finished.

as for the # 3 movies, I have noticed that I only get them when someone else insists on seeing them, with the exception of the latest X-men movie,
that was my idea.

joe_black
Nov. 28th, 2006 08:00 pm (UTC)
Re: hryggilegur (Sorry)
your a work-a-holic I see.

I am the same way...

busting my tail to get school projects done, working during the day at job, and all my funtastic side projects (which never seem to get done... but in the plans to finish after school)
an_aquired_tast
Nov. 28th, 2006 08:36 pm (UTC)
Re: hryggilegur (Sorry)
I guess you could say I am a workaholic,
but I love my job.
I get to travel
I get to work (usually) at night
there is always music around me
and my days are free to pick up whatever side projects might catch my eye
joe_black
Nov. 28th, 2006 11:02 pm (UTC)
Re: hryggilegur (Sorry)
sounds nice!
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )